Captain James Tiberius Kirk.

I am writing this mainly for Jessica's sake, she has never seen Star Trek. We are going to watch it.

Star Trek. The greatest television show of all time. Epic space opera. I could spout to you all the reasons why other people say why it was so revolutionary, but I would prefer to give you mine. We are just going to go over the original series, not the many awesome iterations it has gone through.

The cast:



James Tiberius Kirk
Captain of the Starship Enterprise, his mission has always been to go boldly where no man has gone before (and fornicate with every single remotely human-looking alien girl on the way). Also the master of Kirkrate, with many formidable combat maneuvers such as the Captain Kirk Punch, Kick, and Grunt.

Mr. Spock
Mr. Spock, the master of the Vulcan Nerve Pinch, which closely resembles a friendly shoulder grab but isn't. He also is master of the Vulcan Mind Rape, Vulcan Loveseat, and the Vulcan Television Remote. Extremely logical, and may seem cold and uncaring, but is really a lovable guy deep down.

Dr. Leonard McCoy ('Bones')
The ship's doctor. Famous for his many 'I'm a doctor' lines. For instance: "Dammit Jim, I'm a doctor, not a bricklayer!", "Dammit Jim, I'm a doctor, not a proctologist!", "Dammit Jim, I'm a doctor, not pneumatic hammer!", and my personal favorite,"Dammit Jim, I'm a doctor, not some sexual plaything you can just cast aside!


Lt. Uhura
The communications officer, and the only woman on the ship. Doesn't really do much, just says things like: "Captain, We're being hailed!" or "Captain, I can't make out what they're saying!" Maybe because this show started in the late 60's is why she didn't have as prominent a role as the other men on the ship. I really like the actress who played her though.

Lt. Hikaru Sulu
The helmsman of the ship, and my personal favorite. I can't think of any memorable lines, but there was this one episode where everyone on the ship went crazy, and Sulu thought he was d'Artagan (from the Three Musketeers). Simply awesome.

Ensign Pavel Checkov
Touting the worst Russian accent of all time, Checkov is the psuedo comic relief. Tactical officer to the Enterprise (Their ship), he is famous for being extremely 'naive'. Also, he's a Communist. Everyone hates a Communist.



Engineer Mongomery Scott
I saved the best for last. The greatest character on the whole roster. "Captain, I canna' do it, the rear defribblateors are going into arrest, and're causing a malfunction in the main oobergoober line!" This man wrote the book on excuses. I swear to God, the guy never fixes anything, always just spouts another problem. I think the bastard just makes em' up! He has the ruggedness of a Scotsman though.


Also there were the 'red shirts', security officers who would die at the earliest possible moment. I mean, anything could kill these guys. Even, Chocolate Pudding.

Their ship is also pretty friggin' cool. It has lots of guns, and floats in space, going boldly where no man goes before.

My overview cannot possibly do this show justice, but remember these words:


Space, the final frontier. These are the voyages of the Starship Enterprise. Its five-year mission: to explore strange new worlds, to seek out new life and new civilizations, to boldly go where no man has gone before!